Friday, May 7, 2010

Five Treatments Down, 11 Left to Go

A couple of days after getting home from my last treatment, we acquired a stomach virus. It started with my husband and then proceed to attack each of my children sequentially starting with the oldest and ending with the youngest, and finally hit me. When it hit the two youngest, I was still in bed pretty wiped out from chemo, so my husband ended up taking a couple of days off from work to clean up barf and wash bedding over and over and over again. I have an awesome husband! I don't know of many men who would volunteer for such a nasty job. He did great taking care of the sick kids, and I once again, could rest well knowing they were in good hands. By Thursday morning, I had the stomach virus and was still really struggling on Friday. When I went in for my scheduled blood work on Friday morning, they saw how rough I was feeling, so they gave me a dose of an IV anti-nausea med and IV fluids. I felt so much better after that... it was amazing!

Yesterday and today I started the next phase of my chemo treatment. It started with a visit with my Oncologist. He gave me the results of my second heart (MUGA) scan which I completed a little over a week ago. My first pre-chemo heart scan result was 60%... right smack dab in the center of the normal range. They wanted to retest me after I'd finished the Adriamycin (Red Devil), as it is known to occasionally weaken the heart muscle. The next drug I start (herceptin) can also be hard on my heart, so they wanted to know how my heart was functioning before I started that drug. My second scan result was 54%, still in the normal range, but dropping to a level that makes me nervous. If I drop below 50%, they have to stop giving me the herceptin, which from my understanding, the type of cancer I have has a much higher recurrence rate without that drug. I was not surprised to see a drop in my heart function, as I've been having some bizarre symptoms such as time frames where I can feel my heart race which makes me feel icky, my blood pressure keeps creeping lower and lower, my hands and feet have had some minor swelling, I've had a few near passing out episodes and I tire so easily. So please pray that my heart would stay strong so I can finish the drugs that are needed to treat my cancer!

Thursday, I took my first dose of herceptin. It was easy peasy! No side effects what so ever! As a matter of fact, that same night, I visited a new Mexican restaurant where they served me the largest and most delicious burrito I have ever seen! Think Chipolte, but probably a good 30-40% larger. I think this must be the phase where I gain the 20-30 pounds I've been warned of... food finally looks and tastes good again, which I certainly am enjoying and hoping it stays that way!

Today, I had my first dose of Taxol, which is the drug they were most concerned I would react to. They gave me a premed IV steroid and IV Benadryl and Pepcid to help fight off any allergic reaction and stomach issues. Other then the Benadryl knocking me into a fightful sleep where I attractively drooled all over the hospital's pillow, there were no other side effects! I can tell I'm still very tired, but my mind is so much clearer now then it ever was on the Adriamycin and Cytoxin. This a blessing because I hated that foggy minded feeling that lasted nearly a week with the last chemo treatments. And as of now (8 or so hours post Taxol) I have had zero nausea! Hopefully this continues. I was knocked down to only two oral anti-nausea pills (they've cut out the two strongest - and one of them was the most expensive) and I really don't even have to take those unless nausea rears its ugly head. They've also cut out my oral steroid as well. I also don't have to get an immune system boosting shoot anymore (Neulasta) either, which was a very painful shot I had to receive the day after chemo. Yeah!

So, all in all we are doing well, and I am optimistic that life may return a small piece of normalcy to our crazy household. Thank you to the multitude of you all who have helped carry us this far! I realize that the road is still long, but most days on this road I have felt blessed, thanks to an amazing Heavenly Father and amazing family and friends! I know all of you have your own struggles as well. My hope for you is that you can see the blessings in the dark times. God does love all of us. I must admit, I've had many days where I don't FEEL God's love or blessings, but I KNOW it is there. Some days I CHOOSE to look hard enough to see His hand and blessings in my life and those days turn out to be some of my best. Unfortunately, some days I CHOOSE to give up and not see Him in all of this. I guarantee my lack of vision is not a reflection of God's workings or presence, but a reflection of my poor mindset and lack of faith. But I KNOW in those times that God's loving hand is holding me and my situation. God has big hands and I KNOW He's holding you as well!